January 5, 2009

when fools rush in

Filed under: Doodles, Blabs and Rants — Tags: , , — didee @ 11:51 am
edric, philip, aldion, ryan, marky, neiloyts, and noel

:: Foolish Bois :: edric, philip, aldion, ryan, marky, neiloyts, and noel :: pool party 2007

i miss these guys.

Was organizing my picture folder and saw a bunch of Aprilfools photos.

We are all scattered now to God knows where, but nothing gets better than island hopping and out of town trips and impulsive get-away plans for the weekend.

Some stayed close to the ties we made, some chose to drift away.

I miss the fools.

A very Teary night

Moalboal Escapade :: A very Teary night :: 2006

Neiloys Despidida Party 2007

Neiloy's Despidida Party 2007

And for the finale…

Intosan Splash 2005

Intosan Splash 2005


November 5, 2008


Breaking Rules

Breaking Rules


Know the rules and know when to break them


random thoughts:

There will always come a time in a person’s life when he or she has to take sides. As much as one would want to stay neutral, and stand rooted in the middle ground; the time to choose is inevitable.

There will also come a time in a person’s life when he or she would have to break some rules. Rules set by dogma, and some rules which he set upon himself.

And sometimes, yes sometimes, it feels so damn great to break the rules. Especially those which we set upon our selves.

Sometimes, being proven wrong holds the magic on how life reveals it’s wonderful surprises.


Some rules I heard that needs breaking :

Don’t Trust

Don’t Believe

Don’t Hope

Never Fall in Love

(… and the greatest of all is Love.)


Photo Assignment. October. Second Week. Street Signs

October 8, 2008

Dear C

Filed under: Doodles, Blabs and Rants — Tags: , , , — didee @ 10:22 pm

Dear C,

I have been friends with you for so long now, that though we’re separated by distance I know we are secure where our friendship stands.

A few weeks ago you message me with sad news about your family. About tita. And I cried with you. And I prayed. And I hoped. My heart breaks with you.

I looked back and all I see is your smile and warmth, that captivates people, true people, towards you. You’ve held us all captive with your gift for words. You had me ogling for the next prose, poem or story. And I know that words fall short right now to box what you carry inside your heart.

Hearing your voice break now, breaks me in million shards. That though you’re at the breaking point, you’ve held yourself together for her. You’ve mimic calmness though you quiver inside seeing her in pain. You’ve hidden notes of sadness as you hum to her so she could rest.

I can only pray for His strength to continue where yours would start to weaken.

And when you want to break… break. Know that you are not alone when you want to put the pieces back together.



for my friend C, whose mom is diagnosed with Stage 4 Lung Cancer. Join in me in prayers.

Oct 9.

Thank you all for your prayers. C’s mom passed away a day after this posting.

April 16, 2008


Filed under: Doodles, Blabs and Rants — Tags: , — didee @ 5:49 am

Heaven knows how to make you smile. 🙂


This was taken during Ann’s band gig (xGF – all girls band who are all proudly pinay)

at The Arena at Clark Quay.

These girls are my ka-kulitan, ka-emotan, ka-uban sa kaon, ka-uban sa laag, ka-uban sa uban pang butang.


What bonds us together? There’s something wrong with Us… 😀


I couldn’t stop singing the last song the band played…

Bleeding Love

But something happened
For the very first time with you
My heart melts into the ground
Found something true
And everyone’s looking round
Thinking I’m going crazy
But I don’t care what they say
I’m in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don’t know the truth
My heart’s crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open

October 8, 2007

A toast to friendship

Filed under: Doodles, Blabs and Rants — Tags: , — didee @ 8:36 pm

What makes a good friend?
Is it to be always present in times of need?
Is it to be there to celebrate good times?
Is it to share interest in the same things?
Is it to constantly remember dates?
Is it shutting up? Or speaking up?

I have asked myself countless of times of whether I am, had been, a good friend.

Am I a bad friend when I can’t be happy for a friend’s happiness? Am I a bad friend when I chose to console, to emphatize, and to feel someone elses grief caused by a friend’s happiness ? Am I a bad friend when I can’t force myself to be happy, giddy, vibrant, ecstatic?

If only we can choose which emotions to feel. If only we can break apart ourselves and kill those areas which we don’t want to acknowledge. If only yellows can be pink, and greys can be greens.

Tell me who your friends are and I’ll tell you who you are. But if I tell you some of the company I keep, you might think twice associating yourself with me.

One friend caused me my first visit to prison.How I forced myself to put up a brave face when in the back of my mind I was so scared of what’s gonna happen to him. Of how a simple “no”, lit up his face when he asked me if i believe the charges raised against him. And how words escaped me when for the first time in our friendship, he asked me to pray for him. Him behind bars, and me on the other side with his mom and sister beside me. And then one by one, his cell mates went nearer and joined in. Just silently bowing their heads.

Another friend was so suicidal that she called me just before she crashed her car to a post. Thank God cause she survived it.

Another is so into drugs, but during his sober moments we would talk and he would want to change, and stop the vice. But just a few weeks or months later, he would be off again to God knows where, doing God knows what. It pains your heart to see this situation, but as a person, you can only do so much. Then that person to tell you that those small talks you share with each other means a lot cause he feels that the world is too busy to have small talks with him.

When one time a mom asked me if I could be her daughter’s bestfriend. Her daughter would call me “ate dee”, and I just love her to pieces. She was 17 and I was 20 when we first met. She was strutting in the catwalk of Cebu and sometimes Manila. Next to her I would look like a maid. She was all grace and pin-up smile. While I was plain ol’ tee , jeans, slippers and ever reliable sling bag. But behind the spotlight, she was just my sweet C. She was just 17, and she doesn’t know how to read and write. I have to excuse myself and cry where she can’t see me, when I learned of this. Not because I pity her, but because I feel that it’s just not fair. She knows the basic and yet a grade school undergrad knows more. From then on, she would visit me at UP during my breaks in between classes. And I would teach her how to read and how to write. More and more. Slowly. One of my treasured possession is card and a box of Dunkin Donuts. And in the card she wrote down how much she love me and appreciate me. And in her childlike handwriting and simple words, I learned another lesson at friendship.

When I was just 9 years old, I cried in front of the teacher to ask her not to expell one of my classmates who was such a trouble maker. I also went, together with two other friends, to a friend’s house and asked her parents not to separate cause that would make her sad, and she would have to move to another place and that would make us sad. I was still too young then to understand the problems that grown-ups have to deal with. For me then, the way from point A to point B is just one straight line, and the the points in between don’t exist.

Once I also let a friend stay in our house to protect her from her abusive step father who molested her.

Another friend ran away from home, and i called her mom behind her back just so she won’t worry.

The oldest friendship i keep is with Bryan. Our friendship is as old as us. We are proud to call each other friends since birth. We dream dreams together. We pray for each other. Through heartbreaks and new loves. One person who I won’t think twice to give a knife to, knowing he won’t use it against me. Who conspired with J, on one of my birthdays, to surprise me with fireworks. And now that I’ve practically named him, I won’t dare share the secrets that he has entrusted me… if i’ll tell you, i’d have to kill you. *insert evil laugh* 🙂 He’s steps away from his dreams now. And I am just so proud of him. His life would soon be in Maalaala mo Kaya. He already talked with the staff in Manila, and all I’m worried about is who will play my character. 🙂

I take pride when a friend made it big. Even small achievements we celebrate it over dinner, or coffee, or some drinks. There is always a reason to celebrate when you’re in the company of good friends.

When a friend got a new love, I would beg her/him to share every detail. I get excited and would want to meet the guy/girl. Sometimes I play cupid, and match make friends from different circles.

I’ve develop friendship with the special kids when an artist friend asked me to join her when she organized an Art workshop for them. Of how 5 words can express so much sincerity, “I love you teacher dian“. I’m no teacher, it was them who taught me what really matters in life.
Friends where years of silence separates you, and yet the moment you bridge the communication, it seems like nothing has passed.

These are just some of the pillars that I surround myself with. I am not sharing this to gloat, but to think of, to remember during moments like this when I question my capacity to be a good friend.

I don’t choose my friends, or put qualifications. if my friends have checklist of their own, I’ll probably flunk.

I consider myself blessed, because I have been given the honor of knowing, loving and being loved by them. Perhaps somewhere in my sometimes messed up life, I did something good and they are my prize.

What does it take to be a good friend? Or to simply put what I feel concerning a certain friendship, if I can’t be happy for your happiness, does that make me a bad person?

i don’t know if this makes sense… I love you and I want you to be happy, but (for now) I am not sure if I’m happy for you.

Can somebody please tell me they understand me?

October 2, 2007

$1 Ice Cream

Filed under: Doodles, Blabs and Rants — Tags: , , , — didee @ 3:51 pm

When I first got here in Singapore, some friends who were here ahead of me, gave me a short tour of what this little but booming city has to offer. We went to see the Merlion, circled around the Fountain of Wealth which is the world’s largest fountain made of bronze. Those were my two first stops not counting the malls of course, where i literally gawked, mouth wide open, at the pretty nice dresses, bags and shoes. Patya na lang ko! It was no accident that they call this place the shopping capital of Asia. I practically have to drag myself out of one of the shops which sells papers, hand made cards and all sort of paper products. Yes, paper can make me go gaga. (So imagine my happiness when I went back a few days after, on my own, bought a card and sent it to J back home.)

But anyway, before that day ends, i was treated to a $1 ice cream. You know those stalls in the park or somewhere on the street, something like that. I was then with my new found family. My temporary housemates for one month until i find a place of my own. I had a taste of my first $1 ice cream, red bean flavor, sandwiched between two wafers. I made my first bite of the $1 ice cream, together with people I wasn’t close to back at home, and yet found a common bond and certain familiarity here miles away from whats familiar with me. As I tasted the refreshingly sweet frosted delight, I thank God that He gave me new set of friends to bond with and build ties with, a new family I can take care and would take care of me. There is indeed sweetness in everything that He does.

Fast forward a few weeks later. New faces joined us in our new home. And as we welcomed them and interrogated them about what’s been happening back at Pinas, we go out and let them have a taste of their first $1 ice cream with their new family here.

Whenever a new soul come knocking here, looking for their chance to display their skills in the booming IT industry of SG, they will sure to find a friend who will help them get that chance. It’s a modern bayanihan if you ask me. People uniting to achieve a certain goal. And of course with $1 ice cream, any flavor of your choice, to sweeten it up a little more.

It’s amazing what bond a $1 ice cream can create.

Thank you neil, rachel, mark, alfon, janz, yvonne, lex,shanta,rinnel & edric for a very sweet and special $1 ice cream. More to come guys! 🙂

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