Windchimes

January 12, 2006

belong.to.me

Filed under: Doodles, Blabs and Rants — didee @ 1:49 pm

Image hosted by Photobucket.com Back when i was in college, we were having problems at home and the next thing i know i was packing my stuff and was leaving home. It was Midterm week then at UP. Exams and reports were up to my neck. I just feel so alone then. I was just a baby christian, I was new in my faith. the only comfort i hang on to during that time is that I have God. That was the time I even started calling God my “PaKing”, my “Papa King” is my term of endearment to Him, and I am His princess. I took my exams with a bag at my side full of hurriedly folded clothes. It was really a wonder how i even passed those exams. I remembered answering my History test with tears blurring my eyes. Later that afternoon, i was staying at one of the Tambayan at UP, and this song was playing in my mind. And i Have never felt more comforted.

And now, again it came to my rescue. Now that I am so overwhelmed with pain, and I just feel so alone. That no matter how many people would comfort you, there’s just that one unreachable spot inside that only He could comfort. A God-shaped hole. There’s just too much pain right now and i don’t know where to start healing. But Paking is just so gracious. He takes His time with me. I have always been a stubborn kid. And He knows that more than just words, it is presence that I badly need right now. In the middle of work, he would sometimes whisper a verse in my heart, and i would just check it out not knowing what it’s gonna be. And I would just read “Though the mountains be shaken, and the hills be removed, my unfailing love for you will never be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed.”. And i have to step up from my desk and run to the comfort room, or else people would just see me bawl my heart out. He is just so wonderful. I am so lost with the pain that I am blinded by it. And here He comes just taking His time slowly, saying that His love is steadfast, and He is here to stay, and that He understands. I know that there are a lot of things that needs to be corrected, but more than anything else, first comes His comfort. And as for my papa at home, it just brings me to tears when he tells me “kaya mo yan. Just be firm, strong and brave.”

Here is the song by Joanna Carlson,

Belong To Me

she walks in and closes the door
shuts the world out of sight for another lonely night
and she cries as she kneels on the floor
for this empty room and this solitary life

but heaven is hearing and sharing each tear
and i know the father is near
he’s saying
you can belong to me
i’ll cherish you, treasure you, love you completely
someday you’ll finally see
how precious you are in my eyes
you’ve never been out of my sight
i love you for all of your life
you can belong to me

a little boy lies on his bed
wonderin where daddy’s gone and did he do something wrong
and he hides all the fears in his head
as he tries to be strong
but he feels so alone

and heaven is hearing and sharing each tear
and i know the father is near
he’s saying
you can belong to me
i’ll cherish you, treasure you, love you completely
someday you’ll finally see
how precious you are in my eyes
you’ve never been out of my sight
i love you for all of your life
you can belong to me

…..

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